You know when you see a trailer for a movie and you think “OMG! That movie looks fantastic!” and then you see it and you get that same feeling you had when one of the bigger kids stole your favourite toy in kindergarten? That’s exactly what The Nines is like: A candied apple made from fallen fruit.

The movie stars Ryan Reynolds as three different characters (Gary – a Hollywood TV star, Gavin – a TV showrunner and Gabriel – a doting husband and father) who live parallel lives in what appears to be different dimensions. Confused yet? Well, I think that’s the point. It all starts when Gary accidentally burns down his house, tries crack with a fat hooker and flips his Toyota Prius, which lands him in house arrest. Confined in the home of a showrunner currently on assignment in Toronto, he starts realizing that there is something up with “the nines” or just how often that number seems to appear in everything. And then things get strange.

This movie is a perfect example of why the label “indie” doesn’t necessarily mean “good.” Although first-time director John August has written several successes in the past (Big Fish, Tim Burton’s Corpse Bride, and Titan A.E.) this one is lacking in the most important element of movie making: A riveting storyline. It seems that in attempting to make a clever and thriller-like story based on the philosophical theory of solipsism, he forgot that if the audience doesn’t understand what’s going on or loses interest, it’s impossible to get the point across (if there is one).

The supporting cast (Melissa McCarthy, better known as “Sookie” from Gilmore Girls, Hope Davis and Elle Fanning – Dakota’s sister) do a superb job, but the usually funny and endearing Reynolds seems completely out of his element and his characters become almost comic caricatures of themselves. One wonders if he suffers a bit from the Jim Carrey syndrome: Funny man trying to be serious becomes unfunny boring man. But Reynolds excelled as a psycho killer in The Amityville Horror so it’s not clear what went wrong here.

The bottom line? The Nines is a good idea gone bad. For the countless esoteric interpretations you’ll undoubtedly find online, we have as many reasons why it failed.

Morten’s take: Ryan Reynolds should stick to what he does best – being funny. Bring back Two Guys, a Girl and a Pizza Place!

Angela’s Take: Is that all there is?